Friday, February 15, 2008

Marriage Insights To Commemorate our Anniversary

It's been 5 years. 5 whole years since I began to live my life with a man. My man. 5 years since I pledged my life to him. 5 years since my life changed. And 5 years since I began this exciting experience called: marriage.

If I had known at the beginning of our marriage all I know now, I have to wonder what I'd be learning today. So, to all you single people our there or for those of you that are in your early years of marriage (that would be any number less than 5), let me share a few insights I've had to learn through experience.

#1: If he suggests it (and "it" could mean anything from wanting a cup of coffee to wanting to sell your house), don't treat it as a mere suggestion; his "suggestion" is more serious than the laws of the Medes and Persians.

#2: Never under any circumstances leave a man waiting for anything. Never.

#3: Guys are next to impossible to buy gifts for. And by next to impossible I don't mean they're on this side of impossible; they are actually a step beyond impossible. Boughten gifts are typically very difficult to get if you really want to impress a guy. I mean, really, a shirt is easy to buy but most guys don't get all gushy about a shirt. The best thing I've found to get a man is... um... well, I really can't think of anything right now. After 5 years of marriage I have learned that it is impossible to have a good "stand-by gift" for a man.

#4: You remaining calm in stressful situations (i.e. the two year old spills an entire glass of red koolaid all over the white dining room carpet) is equal to everything good in a marriage. This really impresses men. Obviously, the contrary is also true.

#5: The longer I'm married, the more complicated I believe that men get. They don't like to be usurped over yet there are some things you better be in charge of OR ELSE. They don't like it when you throw leftovers out yet they can get tired of the same thing, day after day. They may not like ice cream with their dessert but mention Dairy Queen and that sounds good. They like to have peace and quite and be left alone sometimes but at the same time not want you to leave. They are complicated. But, that can be so fun because of the creative situations you can create in order to get around their complicatedness. I love that challenge.

#6: Marriage is a bed of roses... without the thorns.

#7: Seriously. Being married is one of the best situations I have ever found myself in. It is fun. Fulfilling. Satisfying. Blissful. And honeymoons don't have to end.

#8: Oh and if you ever disagree with your spouse, that disagreement can do one of two things: pull you apart or draw you closer. In a good marriage, it will draw a couple closer together. (So bring on the disagreements right?... of course not but you know what I mean.)

#9: A husband reveals the bad in you... and the good too.

#10: To have a good husband you have to be a good wife. (Ignore this point all you husbands! Your wives may kill me for saying that but really, it is very true.) And no, I have not seen the contrary to always be true.

#11: The longer I'm married, the less advice I have.

#12: (read insight number eleven again.)

I'd like to take this time to make a little speach and say that I married a good man who makes everyday an adventure. I never thought being married would be this good but ever since I met Toby, he has proven that some things in life are better than they appear they could be. Or should be. Seriously. Sometimes I feel bad for enjoying life as much as do because of my husband.

As we enter the "year of grace" in our marriage (number 5 = grace), I look forward to it with joy and know it will only get better.

I love you Honey!


Jessica said...

Love the insight hope I can make use of it someday!
Happy Anniversary Courtney!

Pat VE said...

Does Toby read your blog regularly? I didn't know just the date of your anniversary, but Happy 5th Anniversary. I'm glad you got to have the time to yourself, in your own home and without the kids. It really makes getting back with the kids an experience to look forward to when you've been separated awhile. Wishing you grace for this coming year. Pat

Aimee Kieffer, aka "Momzoo" said...

congratulations on five years.

I think men are simple creatures. They need 3 things:
1. Good food in their belly
2. A soft place to land
3. A woman who treats him like a King.

Anonymous said...

Are #1 & #2 a joke? They don't make any sense. You should treat your husband like you would like to be treated and he should do the same for you. But..."not keep him waiting" and the idea that a "suggestion" from him is always, oh, so serious...we'll that's laughable. And number five sounds like you are on a course for domestic violence. No one should be that moody. You might want to rethink a few things on your list.

Fern said...

Bless you and your husband, but I have to agree with Anonymous.