Kid Klips (formerly titled, Landon's Lines)

The Children Jesus Loves

After several minutes of intently staring at a picture of a large family and a family we know well, Landon touchingly started singing, "Jesus Loves The Little Children."

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Thou Shalt Not Spit In Church

Learning to spit has been quite the boyish adventure for Landon. But, it's been a challenge for him to learn where spitting is allowed: outside and in the bathtub. We hadn't covered any other interior dwellings besides the house, the van and the store, when in church one Sunday morning, I looked over just in time to see a nice mouth-full of saliva shoot carefully out of his puckered lips and land on to the floor with a "splat."

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Dumb Moms

After noticing a stray sales tag laying on the floor, I asked Landon, "Could you pick up that piece of paper for me please?"

"It's called a 'tag,' Mom," he said condescendingly as he picked it up.

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Gullible Girl

While browsing through the Home Show with Janae recently, several exhibitors would exclaim over Janae as we walked past their booths. One lady started gasping and sighing over "the cutest little girl" and Janae really gave her a scene.

"Just look at you! Aren't you a cutie?!" the lady said.

Upon hearing the, "look at you" command, Janae suddenly became really serious and looked down, carefully examining the front of her dress and then finally pointed to her favorite shoes on her feet. She seemed to conclude that the cuteness came from those.

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A Language Of Her Own

After hearing Janae jabber unintelligibly, Landon asked me what Janae had just said.

"Who knows!" I exclaimed.

To which he responded with a swift, "Jea does."

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What Tape Measures And Stomachs Have In Common

Sitting quietly and playing with a tape measure, Landon suddenly piped up and told me he had a stomach.

Thinking we were on the subject of anatomy, I said, "That's right and what else do you have?"

"A tape measure," was his immediate response.

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One Thing God Doesn't Do

While informing me that Janae had just peed on the floor, Landon was busily pulling up his own pants and getting the flap of his jeans secured. Janae's clothes were intact, dry and totally not evident of a potty accident.

He willingly took me back to the room where the fault had been committed and I could see it was a trademark 'boy' accident. Couple that with the fact that he was still snapping his own pants and Janae's snaps-in-the-crotch overalls were all secure and completely dry and it was very obvious who the culprit was.

"Landon," I said sternly while taking a deep breath, "You do not pee on the floor like that... pee only goes in the toilet."

He pointed at his sister and said, "Tell Jea that," in a tone the depicted his complete agreement with me.

Realizing now that not only had he peed on the floor but he was also lying, I was struck with the complication of explaining to a 2 year old what a lie was and why they were bad.

After explaining to him the best way I knew how, I finally told him, "Landon, God hates lying."

His deep, dark eyes stared intently into mine as I said those last words and I felt confident that the fear of God was in his heart regarding the subject of lying.

And then he asked, "Mom, does God pee?"

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Bringing Landon's Heart Home

Aunt Brittney was conversing with Landon on the phone one day, just a short time before we planned to leave and go to one of my routine midwife visits. They were talking about hearing the baby's heartbeat.

"Where is your heart, Landon?" Britt asked him.

"Down the road somewhere," he said.

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Grew Up Overnight

We've often tell Landon that when he gets bigger, he'll get to go to work with Daddy.

One day, Toby had a small job to do that Landon was capable of joining him on. Upon hearing that he was going with Daddy to work, Landon asked me, "Am I going to be bigger now mom?" And he pointed up at the ceiling, indicating his new height.