So I choose to like the cat. End of story.
Now, if it's a nice cat that always uses it's litter box on a regular basis and doesn't tear apart the leather recliner and doesn't infest the house with fleas, I can be cool with such a cat. I guess I assumed my litmus test for cat standards was just limited to those three things.
Actually, quite recently.
About 4 minutes ago, I realized that a fourth requirement has been evaluated and definitely certified for the Domesticated Feline Litmus (Aptitude) Test (Exam) -- or the DEFLATE test:
In order for the domesticated female feline to survive it's entire feline lifespan, it must never participate in the practice of fertility sounds and rituals. These sounds and rituals include but are not limited to:
- Vocalized purring
- Incessant meowing
- Loud vocalized cat sounds that sound slightly robotic
- Weird vocalized cat sounds performed with lots of feline body movement
- Pounding on OUR bedroom door at night (especially during the 12:00am - 4:30am range)
- Insisting on pounding on said bedroom door at night
- Resuming annoying cat sounds
- Never stopping the vocalization of fertility mating call and feline body movement
- Vocalized purring blended with ghost-like-sounding meowing
- All above descriptions combined
If only I had started a college fund for my kids. Because, IF I had such a college fund, I would find it well worth it to spend on spaying this
about to be killed annoying cat: who wants a parent who is known by the neighborhood children as the mom who killed the pet house cat with her bare hands?
I know my children sure don't. But right now, I really don't care...
"Here kitty, kitty..."